IT WAS supposed to be a celebration of new life, but the day of Robin Du Plessis’ baby scan became one that would haunt her forever.
Clutching the envelope containing the gender of their unborn baby, her fiancé Willem was driving Robin and their daughter Shylo, just hours after their ultrasound.
Robin Du Plessis welcomed her daughter Roane in February but it was with a heavy heart[/caption]
They had been to visit Robin’s mother, who was organising their surprise gender reveal party, to deliver the envelope with their unborn baby’s sex on it.
But just minutes later, tragedy was about to rip the family apart.
In August last year, their car was involved in a terrible crash that claimed the life of Willem and their daughter Shylo.
Robin, 31, says: “It was such a horrific accident and I can’t believe we have lost them both.
“I then had to give birth to our daughter Roane on my own, and I’m bringing up my two boys without Willem.
“When their little sister grows up, I’m going to tell her all about her amazing dad and little sister.
“I will make sure they are never forgotten.”
In the days leading up to the tragedy, the couple were thrilled to be expecting again, and were looking forward to their upcoming gender reveal party.
Robin, who lives in South Africa, says: “I was 16 weeks pregnant, and more than anything I wanted to have a gender reveal party.
“I’d never had one before, even though I’d already given birth to three children, but this pregnancy was going to be my last baby and I wanted to do something special.”
The couple had met in June 2020, and Robin says she felt an ‘instant spark’ between them.
“After a few months we decided to go for a drink together one night after work, and from then on we became a couple,” she recalls.
“He was my soulmate. My Mr Right. I felt a depth of love that I’d never felt for anyone before. And he felt the same about me. It was as though we didn’t need anyone else but each other.”
The couple welcomed their daughter, Shylo, a couple of years later in 2022.
“Willem was the most amazing dad,” she says. “He doted on Shylo and he was amazing to my two boys from a previous relationship.
“I couldn’t believe my luck in finding him. It was as though it was meant to be. We were crazy about each other.
“We spent night after night outside our house with a campfire, just talking and looking up at the stars. And talking about our future together as a family.”
She held her daughter Shylo for 45 minutes while she took her final breaths[/caption]
The couple had been trying for another baby when Robin sadly suffered a miscarriage in 2023.
“I was convinced that something had been wrong for me to have lost it like that,” she says.
“It had never happened to me before, and I’d been distraught over it.
“So when I found out I’d fallen pregnant again, the following year Willem was thrilled, but I was so anxious in case it happened again.
“I was scared, but he was convinced it was going to be alright.”
Day of disaster
Robin told her mum that she wanted a gender reveal party and she said she would organise it.
So at 16 weeks pregnant, on August 30, 2024, the couple drove over to the hospital to have a scan.
Robin says: “We’d brought the kids with us.
“I lay on the scanning table and the doctor ran the scanner over my stomach.
“The heartbeat was strong and clear. It was so tempting to ask what we were having, but we asked the doctor to write it on a piece of paper whether it was a boy or girl, and we sealed it up.
“There was no way we were going to spoil the surprise at our reveal party.”
In total shock I looked at Willem, and he had blood coming out of the side of his mouth
Robin Du Plessis
On the way back from the hospital, the couple called in at Robin’s mum’s house and handed over the envelope so that she could organise the right colour for the reveal.
“We’d brought her some shopping too, and we told her about the scan and how it had gone,” Robin says.
“We talked about who we were going to invite, but I was leaving it up to her to organise. I couldn’t wait.
“After a while we said our goodbyes, and we all got in the car to drive home.
“We lived about an hour from mum, and it was dark driving on the highway.
“Everyone was tired, and we just couldn’t wait to get home.”
The family were about halfway home in an area called Dalmas at around 9pm when they saw some headlights in the rear view mirror.
“There was a car heading towards us,” Robin says.
“It looked like it was coming up fast behind us. We didn’t even have time to say anything before I felt a massive bang.
Where to seek grief support
Need professional help with grief?
- Child Bereavement UK Childbereavementuk.org
- Cruse Bereavement Cruse.org.uk
- Relate Relate.org.uk
- The Good Grief Trust Thegoodgrieftrust.org
- You can also always speak to your GP if you’re struggling.
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- Griefcast: Cariad Lloyd interviews comedians on this award-winning podcast.
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“The next thing I knew I found myself on the road behind our car.
“Dazed and confused, I looked around. There was shattered glass everywhere.”
The car behind the family had crashed into the back of them but the driver had fled the scene.
“I crawled around to the front of the car,” Robin says.
“Willem, one of my boys, and Shylo had also been thrown out of the car on impact.
“My other son was the only one left in the car.
Just 45 minutes later, Shylo took her last breath in my arms
Robin Du Plessis
“In total shock I looked at Willem, and he had blood coming out of the side of his mouth.
“He wasn’t moving. I knew that he was gone. The boys were ok, with just cuts and bruises.
“But Shylo lay there motionless. Not my baby too.
“I knew there was nothing I could do for Willem, but Shylo was barely alive. I cradled her in my arms, tears pouring down my face.”
Tragic last breath
A couple of passers-by stopped by the wreckage and called an ambulance, but for Shylo it was too late.
“Just 45 minutes later, Shylo took her last breath in my arms,” the mum recalls.
“The ambulance arrived two hours later, and they couldn’t revive her. I’d lost both my husband and my beautiful daughter, just like that they were gone.
“It just seemed like some terrible dream.”
The ambulance took Robin and the two boys to hospital where they were checked over.
“I didn’t know if my unborn baby had survived,” she says. “But they did a scan and the heartbeat was still there.
“Willem had been right about one thing, when he had told me this baby was going to be ok.”
Dazed and confused, I looked around. There was shattered glass everywhere
The boys had X-rays and scans too and luckily it showed they had no broken bones.
While she and her baby were unharmed, Robin struggled with the heartbreak of losing her family while trying to carry on with her pregnancy.
She says: “I didn’t know how I was going to be able to carry on without Willem and Shylo. My soulmate and my daughter were gone.
“I went through the rest of my pregnancy in my blur.
“My bump was growing, but Willem wasn’t there to see it.
“I just felt numb through it all. What should have been such a happy time was so empty for me.
“I could feel the baby kicking, and wanted to share it with him so badly.”
Robin delivered their daughter Roane in February this year.
“Willem should have been there by my side,” she says.
“He would have loved to have had another daughter. He’d been so excited about this baby, and he’d never even gotten to know she was a girl.
“I wish with all my heart that he’d been able to meet her. But I’ll make sure she always knows how special her dad and sister were.”
Robin says that she will make sure that Shylo and her dad’s memories are kept alive[/caption]
